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Gadzooks – finally a proper post!

December 21, 2009

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A good few weeks back I promised a return to form. If ‘return to form’ meant not really writing anything and then popping on now and again to apologise, and then make a random comment about the word of showbiz, only to disappear for another few weeks… then I guess this is the perfect beginning of yet another return to form.

It frustrates me that I can’t seem to settle down to blogging again. This has not been a healthy blog for five months now – even my once wondrous Dave Tupper original masthead has gone squiffy in protest. If I were the type to do those crappy New Year’s resolutions, then mine would certainly be to get BMTV up and running again. I miss it. And I think some of you might too. The other day a friend of mine (who I consider one of the wittiest people I know) said he’d popped on here to see what I’d said of a certain show, only to find nothing. How flattering, but at the same time, gutting. But I guess general apathy is just one of those symptoms. Speaking of which, if you’re reading this now, please pop over to my Just Giving page afterwards and chuck me a few quid.

Onwards…

So much has happened in TV land this year that there’s no point even trying to reflect. I had wanted to do a round up of the decade too (as most publications seem to be doing), but as usual, the Watch With Mothers posse have done a most excellent (and extensive) one of their own, so check it out.

But what I will do is a good-old BMTV’s The Good, The Bad and The Ugly of the year and decade.

2009

The Good

Nick Griffin on Question Time – good as it exposed him as the dumbass racist he is, but also bad because I’m sure NN’s demographic already knew this, and doubt those who voted BNP in the Euro elections watch anything but Jeremy Kyle, GMTV and Heartbeat.

Misfits – In a so-crap-it’s-good kind of way. The “cheeky chirpy one” is far too cheeky and chirpy, but I like how it’s basically Heroes with a tinge of Hollyoaks. Only on episode five, so we’ll see how it goes.

The Bad

FlashForward – What started as an innovative concept, set to be The New Lost(TM) swiftly turned into a lesson in how not to write a script: “What are you saying, Bob?” “I’m saying, Bill, that we could be responsible for that terrible catastrophe that just happened in the world.” Cue dramatic music. Dave and I spent most of episode 2 onwards trying to work out whether this was actually a comedy, and doing Benford impersonations (keeping your top lip as pumped up, but still as possible while you whisper, frowning). It got to the stage where cast members were literally killing themselves in order to leave the failing saga. We’re ‘on a break’ now til the spring. I predict it will not return.

The Ugly

Raymond Blanc’s strange choice of winner for The Restaurant – hmmm, a chef who can’t cook. I know ‘reality’ TV shows are now all about entertainment, but this was so blatant it was patronising. Not sure who it was more insulting to – the viewer or those poor 80s banker rejects.

Susan Boyle – not her, you knobbers. Just the whole way she’s been used. She’s an OK singer. But she’s been made a phenomenon because the nation feels guilty for thinking she’s ugly and therefore talentless. So if her success is down to her (presumed) mediocrity, that means she ISN’T that good (because if she was that good she wouldn’t need a gimmick – ie apparent ugliness – to get her success). So we were right to laugh at her. Sort of thing.

2000s

The Good

The first ever Big Brother – when they didn’t even know the theme tune!

Lost – still hopefully of a satisfactory conclusion.

The Office – the perfect sitcom

Flight of the Conchords – I’ll miss Brit’s jumpers, but I’m glad they saw the way of the Office and quit while they were ahead.  My faves from series one.

and of course

Dr Who –  yes, even with those RTD eps

Torchwood: Children of Earth – RTD is clearly a master (ho ho) at reviving flailing programmes and giving them a right kick up the arse into mainstream. Maybe he could give FlashForward a go.

Outnumbered

Lead Balloon (yes I know it’s just Curb Your Enthusiasm, but I don’t care).

Peep Show

Gavin and Stacey (with the exception of series three)

The Bad

The way BB was turned into a Z-list factory

How TV schedules seem to roll from one reality show to the next: Celeb BB, dancing on Ice, BB, BGT, IACGMOOH, X Factor, Strictly…

Torchwood S1/2

The Ugly

The way Jade Goody was treated by BB chiefs – first a figure of ridicule, then the nation’s sweetheart, then a poster girl for reality TV, then a racist bully, then the queen of hearts. Just. Nasty.

Any kind of tasteless programming – The Boy with a Shed for a Brain, I killed and ate my Mother… That sort of thing. I didn’t see The Execution of Garry Glitter, but this Daily Mail-riddled peep show topped the lot. We’re better than this. Surely.

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Just give. Please.

October 14, 2009

A personal note, from the Badger Diary, if you’ll forgive me.

Dad-Cannon-Brighton-Fort1

A personal note, from the Badger Diary, if you’ll forgive me.
Throughout this whole ‘mourning period’  I’ve been incredibly aware of What Others Think. Am I being too ‘normal’? Will people think me a cold fish? Do they know what’s happened? Etc etc.
Well, now I am utterly focused on other people in a different way. I’m asking them to give me money to shave my head next year.
Here are the details. If ever a post of mine on BMTV has amused or entertained – or just wasted 5 mins before the lunch break – please chuck me a fiver. http://www.justgiving.com/projectegghead/
My family are Jewish, and during the morning period, the men grow a beard – a physical manifestation of their grief. As a non-religious Jew (and a woman!) I felt quite frustrated in the months that followed my Dad’s death that I didn’t do anything physical to mark what has happened. I also wanted to do something to raise awareness and money to fund research for Pancreatic cancer. So my boyfriend Dave and I have decided to raise £2,000 for the Pancreatic Cancer Research Fund (http://www.pcrf.org.uk/index.html) – and during Pancreatic Cancer Awareness Week next year (probably mid November 2010) we’ll shave our heads.
I’m not a runner (I can’t do the marathon thing), but I wanted to do something that would test me. Anyone can sit in a bath of baked beans. Anyone who knows me knows that I am passionate about fashion – perhaps too passionate! My hair is a very important part of my ‘look’ – it’s basically my permanent accessory. Plus, as a woman, my hair is an important part of my femininity. So there’s absolutely no doubt that this will be difficult for me. But I’m determind to do it. After all, I’m lucky enough that it’ll grow back. Others aren’t so fortunate.
To put Pancreatic cancer into perspective:
Forty years ago few children survived childhood leukaemia. Now the survival rate is 80%
Forty years ago only 46% of women diagnosed with breast cancer survived five years or more. Now that figure is also 80%
Forty years ago 3% of people diagnosed with pancreatic cancer survived five years or more. That figure is still 3%
When I read that last statistic I was utterly appalled. I hope you are too.
The problem with Pancreatic cancer is that it’s so difficult to detect, so by the time it is diagnosed, there’s very little that can be done. But with research, hopefully the boffins can find some way around it. Already there is an operation that can be done if the cancer is detected early enough.
Pancreatic cancer seems to be the black sheep of the cancer family. Not many people know about it, and those who do know it to be severe and unrelenting. Hopefully with research and raising awareness this can change. Years ago, cancers like leukemia and lung cancer were feared almost as highly as pancreatic cancer. Now, thanks to funding research and raising awareness, the survival rate is growing daily. I hope in years to come, the same will be said for pancreatic cancer.
My boyfriend Dave is also shaving his head in support. This is a team effort, so please support him too!
Donating through JustGiving is simple, fast and totally secure. Your details are safe with JustGiving – they’ll never sell them on or send unwanted emails. Once you donate, they’ll send your money directly to the charity and make sure Gift Aid is reclaimed on every eligible donation by a UK taxpayer. So it’s the most efficient way to donate – I raise more, whilst saving time and cutting costs for the charity.
So please dig deep and donate now.

A personal note, from the Badger Diary, if you’ll forgive me.

Throughout this whole ‘mourning period’  I’ve been incredibly aware of What Others Think. Am I being too ‘normal’? Will people think me a cold fish? Do they know what’s happened? Etc etc.

Well, now I am utterly focused on other people in a different way. I’m asking them to give me money to shave my head next year.

Here are the details. If ever a post of mine on BMTV has amused or entertained – or just wasted 5 mins before the lunch break – please chuck me a fiver. http://www.justgiving.com/projectegghead/

My family are Jewish, and during the morning period, the men grow a beard – a physical manifestation of their grief. As a non-religious Jew (and a woman!) I felt quite frustrated in the months that followed my Dad’s death that I didn’t do anything physical to mark what has happened. I also wanted to do something to raise awareness and money to fund research for Pancreatic cancer. So my boyfriend Dave and I have decided to raise £2,000 for the Pancreatic Cancer Research Fund (http://www.pcrf.org.uk/index.html) – and during Pancreatic Cancer Awareness Week next year (probably mid November 2010) we’ll shave our heads.

I’m not a runner (I can’t do the marathon thing), but I wanted to do something that would test me. Anyone can sit in a bath of baked beans. Anyone who knows me knows that I am passionate about fashion – perhaps too passionate! My hair is a very important part of my ‘look’ – it’s basically my permanent accessory. Plus, as a woman, my hair is an important part of my femininity. So there’s absolutely no doubt that this will be difficult for me. But I’m determind to do it. After all, I’m lucky enough that it’ll grow back. Others aren’t so fortunate.

To put Pancreatic cancer into perspective:

Forty years ago few children survived childhood leukaemia. Now the survival rate is 80%

Forty years ago only 46% of women diagnosed with breast cancer survived five years or more. Now that figure is also 80%

Forty years ago 3% of people diagnosed with pancreatic cancer survived five years or more. That figure is still 3%

When I read that last statistic I was utterly appalled. I hope you are too.

The problem with Pancreatic cancer is that it’s so difficult to detect, so by the time it is diagnosed, there’s very little that can be done. But with research, hopefully the boffins can find some way around it. Already there is an operation that can be done if the cancer is detected early enough.

Pancreatic cancer seems to be the black sheep of the cancer family. Not many people know about it, and those who do know it to be severe and unrelenting. Hopefully with research and raising awareness this can change. Years ago, cancers like leukemia and lung cancer were feared almost as highly as pancreatic cancer. Now, thanks to funding research and raising awareness, the survival rate is growing daily. I hope in years to come, the same will be said for pancreatic cancer.

My boyfriend Dave is also shaving his head in support. This is a team effort, so please support him too!

Donating through JustGiving is simple, fast and totally secure. Your details are safe with JustGiving – they’ll never sell them on or send unwanted emails. Once you donate, they’ll send your money directly to the charity and make sure Gift Aid is reclaimed on every eligible donation by a UK taxpayer. So it’s the most efficient way to donate – I raise more, whilst saving time and cutting costs for the charity.

So please dig deep and donate now.

BMTV’s Dopplegangers #342

October 13, 2009

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susan_boyle_i_dreamed_a_dream

What have they done to her mouth?????

jack-nicholsons-joker

Get her out!

October 13, 2009

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dannii-minogue-496085552Surely the point isn’t whether or not Dannniiiiii Minogue’s comment last Saturday was homophobic or not, it’s that she had absolutely no right to discuss Danyl/Daniel’s sexuality live on TV, when the poor guy hasn’t even come out (yet).

“If we’re to believe what’s in the papers,” she said, “there was no need to switch the gender reference.”

Well if we’re to believe what’s in the papers, Dannniiiiiii, you clearly would rather have been back in Puss N Boots watching canoodling with a female lap dancer, or at the other end of a botox needle, or under the surgeon’s knife or hating Cheryl Cole. Etc etc etc.

Glass houses, Dannii, glass houses.

It’s not even as if his being or not being gay (straight, bi or whatever) has anything to do with his performing abilities. Her half-arsed apology the following night merely drew attention to her embarrassment – even as she said it the first time, she knew she’d cocked up. And Simon’s very clever ‘mishearing’ only forced her into a corner to repeat it again, thus making her look even more of an arsehole. It just goes to show that Dannii is absolutely under qualified to judge X Factor, if all she can muster for commentry is a pointless ‘joke’ she had no business making.

La Poo

September 25, 2009

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la-roux-foamoFrom glass houses to pots calling kettles black. Oh dear, Elly. Listened to the new La Roux track on the radio the other morning and it sounded just like the other whingy out-of-tune song she released this year. Boring…

Bitter sweet

September 25, 2009

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compcov_sugarbabes_changeBeen watching the unravelling Sugababe palaver unravel since my return from the States. One thing that amused yesterday was this little comment from failed Eurovision act and new ‘Babe Jade. “Not that talented and always slagging people off?” Hmmm, ever heard of glass houses, Jade?

Oh and this (about Sony dropping her after her Eurovision defeat) almost made me gag on my cornflakes it was such a jem – “I tried everything afterwards and worked as a receptionist but I thought there is no way I can do this for the rest of my life. I just knew from being a teenager all I wanted to be was a star.” Don’t worry Jade, I’m sure your old employers aren’t keeping your seat warm after that humble admission.

sugababesvideoSP_450x350And while we’re on the subject of the Sugababes, what the fuck are they doing releasing such nasty initial publicity photos? I can only assume they were rushed out after Keisha’s firing. Seriously, what are they doing here? Farting? waiting for some bumming action? Bizarre.

Thanks to Digital Spy for their loan of the banner. Loving this – see the mastery? Mix n match Sugababe line-up!

Crap Radiohead wannabe admits he’s a gullible twat!

August 26, 2009

matt-bellamy-13Oh, Matt. Do you panic buy petrol any time there’s a sniff of a strike too? In fact, you’re probably out bulk buying it now because I’ve mentioned it here and some kind of twat alert has gone off in your home (or should I say, bunker?).

Loving your oh, so wise words about history. I’m sure your girlfriend really has “seen it all” because she’s from Italy and they had the Roman Empire. Does that mean I personally (at 28 years of age) have seen it all because I’m Jewish and we had the Holocaust?