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Classic Enders cut-and-paste writing

June 19, 2007

In the best example of cut-and-paste writing I’ve seen this year, Eastenders have bowed to pressure from hysterical Madeleine McCann wagon-jumpers and have changed their baby kidnapping story line.

For months now, we’ve been heading in this direction. Dawn gets pregnant by Rob. May plots to kidnap said baby. If reports are to be believed, the original plan was to have May succeed in taking baby Summer, but writers were asked to re-write certain scenes because of events in Portugal. Now, I’m sorry, I know this might sound a tad harsh, but they didn’t re-write scenes when Mark contracted HIV (even though this storyline was in the midst of a huge HIV scare and would clearly have upset some viewers), neither did they re-write the countless deaths, murders, rapes and affairs that have happened over the years even though these have (I’m sure) caused offence to quite a few people.

I know it’s very sad that Madeleine has been taken and it must be a living nightmare for her parents. But children do go missing every day and it seems awful to say it, but I really feel that our country never goes this spare over missing boys (or missing non-white boys for that matter). For a soap to have to re-write a storyline just to protect the feelings of other people seems a tad ridiculous. If this was implemented accross the board, we’d be left staring at a blank screen of an evening. Although judging by the past few episodes, maybe a blank screen would be better.

We’ve been treated to the biggest U-turn of the decade. Rob changes his mind (again) and helps May abduct Dawn and her pregnant bump. Okay, I can see how Rob might have been swayed to have a quick fumble in May’s surgery -– trapped in the Miller’s house with only Keith and Genghis for company would drive anyone into the arms of a psychotic maniac (and I suppose there’s the fact that he was married to her for years).

But when we were introduced to the couple, it was made very clear to us that their marriage was over. She was barren and he was playing away. So how on earth could Rob suddenly do a u-turn and decide that actually, he’d rather be with a woman who could kidnap and drug a young mother. Hate to paraphrase Dawn here but did he really think May would make a good mother?

I just find the whole idea ludicrous. Yes, he’s weak and easily swayed by the women in his life, but I find it totally implausible that anyone would rather be with a maniac who’s addicted to prescription drugs (and he knows this, remember) than the mother of his baby. OK, so she’s a bit of a chav, but he did have feelings for her – he was involved with her before she was pregnant after all and confessed his love ages before he knew she was pregnant. Surely, if they had to change the plot (without losing it) so as to make May fail in her plan, they could have done this without Rob going back to May.

Yes, I know it’s not real life and you have to take into account artistic license, but it’s at times like this that I really think the writer’s team at Enders are a bunch of monkeys sitting around a table.

>> PS Kudos to Amanda Drew who plays Dr May. Excellent thrilling acting.

3 Comments leave one →
  1. Rich permalink
    June 19, 2007 4:08 pm

    Kudos to Amanda Drew for being, er, Amanda Drew. Is he married in real life?
    I’ll get me coat………..

  2. Swineshead permalink
    June 19, 2007 4:16 pm

    So long as they end this perpetual bloody saga soon I’ll be happy. It’s been horrible plot-baggage since day one – let’s have more storylines featuring the heroic Darren, the only decent and amusing actor in the Square these days (apart from Keith – but he’s pretty much inanimate).

    The site’s looking nice these days, Badger…

  3. Badger Madge permalink
    June 20, 2007 7:51 am

    Why thank you Mr S. Thought it was time for a change after over 200 posts (yay!).

    Agreed this has been spun out for too long, but then I’d be up in arms if it had been a quick turn-around (like the opther night’s shock u-turn).

    Agreed that the guy playing Darren has demonstrated superb acting of late. They should make more of him.

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