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Beside the seaside…

January 22, 2007

What would you do if you were stranded on a desert island? Would you a) start building a grand house for you and your homies, or would you b) sunbathe, chill out and get to know the other inhabitants of the island. Okay, it might not be the wisest thing, but I’d actually choose B. Coming from the rain-soaked UK to a tropical island deep in the South Pacific, I think you’d forgive me for not picking up a spade as soon as I’d landed.

So I suppose that makes me a Tiger eh? Yes, the new series of the original reality TV show, Shipwrecked, started yesterday and is set to continue for the next 20 weeks. So that’ll be a good five months of looking at beautiful thin people some in bikinis, some not, some bitching some pulling each other and mostly just generally getting on each others tits. Great.

The last series was stellar with the original tribes main differences being that one had never been away from home before and one tribe had all been to university. This year, it’s boys against girls, which I think is a bad idea because obviously the boys’ hut is going to be better as the girls can’t build because they’re just weedy girls, which means that anyone visiting both islands is going to pick the boys, so the Sharks are off on an unfair advantage from the word go. Plus, any girl visitor will pick the ‘boy’ island because she’ll want to be pampered by boys, and likewise, what bloke wouldn’t want five sexy girls in bikinis waiting on him hand and foot?

Anyway, stand-out islander for me from the start was Lucy a sloanie who hates fat people, foreign people and basically anyone who isn’t a British Imperialist like her – she even wishes we could bring back slavery. What a girl!

She’s sure to find Will, a Construction Manager from Kent a right catch – he who strides around his parents’ estate gun in hand occasionally yelling “pull!” Or maybe she’ll find love with Stevie, a socialite from London who’s parents are so rich they bought him a city pad just so he wouldn’t trash their house – surely some discipline would be cheaper folks (but obviously too much hassle). Stevie admits he doesn’t actually do anything (other than hold ‘pimping’ parties on his roof-top terrace) and only cooked his first meal on the second day of island life (it was rice and beans, by the way). What a guy! Can’t wait for Stevie to meet Sophia who left home at 15 and has always worked (sometimes more than two jobs at a time). Ooooh, the fireworks.

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