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"They f*ck you up, your mum and dad…"

June 7, 2006

Let’s just think about this now, Sonia, shall we? Rebecca’s spent the first few years of her life living with the cardboard cut-out that was Nanny Margaret, Nanny Margaret then dies leaving her to the clutches of the Velociraptor that is Pauline Fowler (it’s that glint in her eyes, you just know she’s going to pounce any minute and devour her prey), she has to cope with Sonia and Martin arguing over her (and over Naomi for that matter)… Now, do you really think it’s a good idea to turn her life upside down all over again by telling her you’re her real mum?

And haven’t we been here before? “You’re not my muvvah…” “Yes I am!”

Nah, far best to wait until the little tyke is in her teens and about to go off to Spain with her paedophilic uncle. That would make much better sense.

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